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| 2004-02-26 | The Lucky Leprechaun of the 13th Hole | Rating: 40/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| A golfer was on vacation in Ireland and while playing he made a hole-in-one. With that a leprechaun jumps out from the trees and says, "I am the lucky leprechaun of the 13th hole. I'll grant you any wish." The player thought a bit and said, "Could you make me weeny a bit larger?" Well, by the time he got to the 14th tee it was showin' below his shorts. He continued his game and on the 15th hole it was draggin' along behind him. By the 18th he could hardly make it to the green. He went straight to the pro shop and asked the pro how to fix it. He was told that legend has it that you must go back and make another ace and see the leprecahn again. After purchasing five buckets of balls he made his way back to the 13th and frantically began hitting shot after shot until finally he made the hole-in-one. Again the leprechaun offered any wish. The player asked, "Could ya make me legs a bit longer?" |
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| 2004-02-26 | Just Say No | Rating: 10/100 based on 1 votes. | ||||||||||
| Barry took a girl out on her first date. When they pulled off into a secluded area around midnight, the girl said, "My mother told me to say no to everything." "Well," Barry said, "do you mind if I put my arm around you?" "No," the girl replied. "Do you mind if I put my other hand on your leg?" "N-n-no," the girl replied. "You know," Barry said, "We're going to have a lotta fun if you're on the level about this." |
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| 2004-02-26 | Toys and Tits | Rating: 10/100 based on 1 votes. | ||||||||||
| What do toys and tits have in common? They're both originally made for kids, but dads end up playing with them. |
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| 2004-02-25 | Safe Sex | Rating: 10/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| Do you practic safe sex? Yes, I moved the bed away from the wall so you won't hit your head as much. |
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| 2004-02-25 | Bad Trip to Hallmark | Rating: 30/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| At the card shop: A woman was spending a long time looking at the cards, finally shaking her head, "No." A clerk came over and asked, "May I help you?" "I don't know," said the woman. "Do you have any 'Sorry I laughed at your dick' cards?" |
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| 2004-02-24 | The Morning After the Honeymoon | Rating: 10/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A young couple were married, and celebrated their first night together, doing what newlyweds do, time and time again, all night long. Morning comes and the groom goes into the bathroom but finds no towel when he emerges from the shower. He asks the bride to please bring one from the bedroom. When she gets to the bathroom door, he opened the door, exposing his body for the first time to his bride. Her eyes went up and down and at about midway, they stopped and stared, and she asked shyly, "What's that?", pointing to a small part of his anatomy. He, also being shy, thought for a minute and then said, "Well, that's what we had so much fun with last night." And she, in amazement, asked, "Is that all we have left?" |
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| 2004-02-24 | Flip Her Over | Rating: 10/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A man is about to get married, but he is extremely nervous about the honeymoon be cause he is a virgin. The night before the wedding, he confinds to his father about his nervousness. "Oh I'm so scared I don't know what to do!!" cried the son. "It's ok", said the father, "I'll tell you what. I'll get the room on the other side of your hotel room, and I'll yell to you what you should do." That sounded good to the son, so they agreed on it. That night, the son was still scared. He locked himself in the bathroom and refused to come out. After a while, his wife is knocking on the door because she has to shit really bad. "Honey let me in, I have to shit!!" she cried. But still he would not open the door. Finally, she has to go so bad, she shits in a box. When the son comes out of the bathroom, he steps in it. "AW SHIT!!" he cried. From the wall his father says,"Flip her over son!" |
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| 2004-02-23 | Midget Nuns | Rating: 40/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| Two drunken salesmen knock loudly on the door of a convent until one of the rudely awakened nuns answers the door by saying, "May I help you?" The larger of the two salesmen slurs his words asking, "Do you haaave annny mid.., err, midg... midget nuns?" The nun, taken aback, answers, "Why no we don't." The large salesman says again, "Are you sure?" The nun answers again by saying "Yes." The large saleman demands to speak to the mother superior and creates such a ruckus that the mother superior shows up at the door as well. The large salesman asks her, "Do you have or do you know of any other convents hearabouts that have a midget nun?" The mother superior answers, "No we don't have, I don't know any and I am quite sure that there are none in the area as I know all the nuns from each of convents. So please tell us what this is all about." At this point the larger salesman turns to the smaller one and slaps him then yells at him: "You see!, I told you so!, You fucked a penguin you drunk bastard!" |
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| 2004-02-23 | Annoying Bus Rider | Rating: 55/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A group of people were traveling cross-country on a Greyhound bus. The driver had just turned onto the interstate highway when a woman came up to him and said, "Please stop the bus, there's a man back there who is bothering me." The driver said he'd stop at the very next exit. A short while later, another woman came up and made the same complaint. When the driver was finally able to stop, he walked to the rear of the bus and saw a little, old, baldheaded man down on his hands and knees. The bus driver asked, "Sir, what seems to be the problem?" "Well," says the little, old man, "I lost my toupee and I'm looking for it. I thought I'd found it several times, but mine parts on the side." |
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| 2004-02-22 | Barbie & GI Joe? | Rating: 10/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A little girl sat on Santa's lap during the Christmas season. "Santa," she said, "I want a Barbie doll and a G.I. Joe for Christmas." Santa replied, "Well, don't you know Barbie comes with Ken?" "No," answers the little girl, "Barbie fakes it with Ken, she cums with G.I. Joe!" |
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