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| 2004-02-29 | Is That a Paycheck In Your Pocket? | Rating: 47/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| The subway car was packed. It was rush hour, and many people were forced to stand. One particularly cramped woman turned to the man behind her and said, "Sir, if you don't stop poking me with your thing, I'm going to the cops!" "I don't know what you're talking about miss - that's just my pay check in my pocket." "Oh really," she spat. "Then you must have some job, because that's the fifth raise you've had in the last half hour!" |
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| 2004-02-28 | Bobbit's Real Name | Rating: 23/100 based on 4 votes. | ||||||||||
| Q: What was Lorena Bobbit's maiden name? A: Lorena Kutchacockoff |
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| 2004-02-28 | Know When to Quit | Rating: 10/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| A guy with a 25-inch penis went to a doctor and said, "I can't live with this anymore! It's too long." The doctor replied, "I can't do anything for you, but if you see the witch doctor in the bayou, she can help you." So, he went to the bayou and saw the witch doctor. The witch doctor said, "Go into the swamp and a female frog. Ask her to marry you. She'll say "No", and you'll lose 5 inches off your member!" So, he went to the swamp and found the frog and asked her, "Will you marry me?" "No!", she said. He lost 5 inches off his member! The guy liked the results, and thought, 20 inches is just too much. So he asked the frog again, "Will you marry me?" The frog said, "No!" And the guy lost another 5 inches. He thought, God, 15 inches is great! But 10 inches would just be perfect. So he asked, "Will you marry me?" And the frog said, "How many time do I have to tell you . . . NO! NO! NO!" |
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| 2004-02-28 | What's New at the Office | Rating: 50/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A man comes home from work one day and he says to his wife: "Honey, I got a new secretary. And imagine what happened! She's got a red and white bra. You know, these are the colors of my favorite football team. Anyway, it's not a big deal but it feels good." The next day when they come home his wife asks, "How was your day?" The man says: "Fantastic! It's not only her bra that is red and white but also her panties. You know it's not a big deal but it really feels good!" The third day they meet at home after work and now the man asks his wife, "And what happened today in your office, honey?" She says, "Oh, nothing special, sweetheart. I got a new boss today. His dick is two inches longer than yours. You know it's not a big deal but, it feels good!" |
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| 2004-02-28 | Favorite Part of a Farmer's Job | Rating: 37/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| Q: What is the favorite part of a farmers job? A: Getting down and dirty with its hoe. |
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| 2004-02-27 | Going to the Prom | Rating: 10/100 based on 1 votes. | ||||||||||
| Three kids are sitting around and one kid asks, "What's the earliest thing you can remember?" The first kid says, "I remember these two hands reaching in, grabbing my head, bringing me out of this dark place into the light, turning me upside down, and spanking my bottom!" The second kid says, "I remember being in this dark, warm place, floating, having a grand old time!" The third kid says, "I can remember going to the prom with my father and leaving with my mother!" |
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| 2004-02-27 | 300% Impotent | Rating: 23/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| A woman goes to her doctor, complaining that her husband is 300% impotent. The doctor says, "I'm not sure I understand what you mean." She says, "Well, the first 100% you can imagine. In addition, he burned his tongue and broke his finger!" |
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| 2004-02-27 | Sneak Peek | Rating: 30/100 based on 2 votes. | ||||||||||
| A child and his friend decided to sneak into his sister's room. They started to look around, but his sister was coming to her room. They hid in the closet and watched from there. The sister had with her a boyfriend. After a few moments of teasing, several moans and screams can be heard. Afterwords, the sister exclaims, "You've been where no man has been before." The child in the closet then noted, "He must have fucked her up the ass!" |
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| 2004-02-27 | The New Penis Tax | Rating: 10/100 based on 1 votes. | ||||||||||
| The only thing that the IRS has not yet taxed is the male penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off and 10% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts. Effective January 1, 1999, your penis will be taxed according to size. The brackets are as follows: 10-12" Luxury Tax $30.00 8-10" Pole Tax $25.00 5-8" Privilege Tax $15.00 4-5" Nuisance Tax $3.00 Males exceeding 12" must file under capital gains. Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION!!!!! IRS NOTE: We are still waiting for answers for the following questions: Are there penalties for early withdrawals? What if one's penis is self employed? Are condoms a deductible expense as work clothes? Is there an additional tax if you are not circumcised? |
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| 2004-02-26 | Nice Hair | Rating: 27/100 based on 3 votes. | ||||||||||
| A man walks up to a woman in his office and tells her that her hair smells nice. The woman immediately goes into her supervisor's office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit and explains why. The supervisor is puzzled by this time and says, "What's wrong with the co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?" The woman replies, "He's a midget." |
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